Last week I headed over to the Stellenbosch wine region for a team lunch at a quaint little spot called Skilpadvlei Wine Farm.  The farm got it’s name from a colony of turtles which was found on the land in the 1800s.  Cute man.

The restaurant has a big stoep where you can soak up some sun and stare out over the vineyards:

Aaaaah bliss...

And inside you’ll find high a super high wooden ceiling and lots of old school farmhouse charm:

Ag dis pragtig...

It was quite windy that day – so we opted to sit inside.  Now what is the first thing one does on a wine farm?  Have some wine of course!  We decided that we had to try the Skilpadvalei wine offerings as none of us had ever heard of this winery.  So we got some Chenin Blanc (R48) & Sauvignon Blanc (R65) to enjoy:

I'm sure you'll get them cheaper on the cellar side. But I can't confirm. We didn't make it that far.

Both were very pleasant.  But the Chenin was definitely more easy drinking than the Sauvignon.

Then onto the food… For starters I had the Deep Fried Brie, served with parma ham, green vigs & a wild berry coulis (R48):

Some of my favourite things in the world, all on one plate. Heaven!

After the rich cheesy starter, I felt very guilty (I’ve been trying to eat really well to rock the bikini season), so for mains I had decided to go for a salad.  Little did I know that at Skilpadvalei, there’s no such thing as a small/light meal.  Even an innocent sounding salad turns out to be a killer.  Check it:

Peppered beef salad: seared fillet medallions served with tossed greens, fresh herbs, deep fried onion rings, pear slices and a creamy blue cheese dressing (R56). In your face losers!!!

The slices of beef fillet in that salad was the softest meat I’ve had in yonks.  I was really impressed.  The other mains at the table looked absolutely irrisistable as well.  Think good hearty meals like your ouma used to make:

Left: Chicken Schnitzel for R68; Right: 300g rump for R94

There was absolute silence at the table – always a sign of good food.  I was totally stuffed after that salad, but I had eyed some freshly baked scones with cream & strawberry jam on the dessert menu when we sat down.  Trust me, there’s no ways you can turn down a regte egte farm treat like that… so I decided to share one with one of my colleagues.   We thought that for R35 price tag we would get one to share (as that would be what you’d expect at a cafe in town).  But boy oh boy were we surprised when this arrived:

Two scones the size of your face! (The sunglasses are there so you can judge size. hehe)

Crazy stuff.  We only barely managed to get through one.  We told them to put the other one back on the display rather.  There was no way I was taking that evil home with me, my ass would never forgive me!

My advice for future visitors would be:  Come hungry.  Like seriously hungry.  Like, don’t eat for a few days hungry.

So on to my Miss K Kiss-o-Meter ratings:

• Vibe: 
• Price:
• Food: 
• Service: 

So if you’re in the winelands and you have a man sized appetite, pop in.  You won’t be disappointed.

xxx